Chennai Super Kings

Sachin's Album

Childhood

With Family

Young Sachin

Rate One

First Century

Various shots

The King of Uppercut

Cute one

Autograph

Funny - Part II

Throwing knives on wife's picture

Husband was throwing knives on wife's picture. All were missing the target!        
Suddenly he received call from her "Hi, what r u doing?"   
His honest reply, "MISSING U"

I will think about it

When a married man says "I'll think about it",

What he really means that,  He doesn't know his wife's opinion yet..

Habbit of talking in sleep

A Lady to Doctor:    
My husband has  habit of talking in sleep! what shud i give him to cure? 
Dr: Give him an Opportunity to speak wen hez awake

Part & Art of living

Having "WIFE" Is A Part Of Living...

But Having "GIRLFRIEND" Along With The "WIFE" Is Art Of Living.

Head & Neck of the family

It is said that Husband is the head of the family, but remember that wife is the Neck of the family & the Neck can turn the Head exactly the way she wants.

Wife: Do you want dinner?

Wife: Do you want dinner?  
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?        
Wife: Yes and no.

What is the Difference between Mother & Wife?

What is the Difference between Mother & Wife?     
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other ensures U Continue to do so.

To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire

Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."

Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.    
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"     
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

I look at your picture and the problem disappears

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?       
Darling: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.

Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?

Wife: honey what r u looking 4?

Wife: honey, what r u looking 4?     
Husband: nothing

Wife: why have u been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour?           
Husband: i was just looking 4 the expiry date

Funny - Part I

I am dying

Husband texts to wife on cell..

"Hi, what r u doing Darling?"

Wife: I'm dying..!

Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"

Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."

Husband: "Bloody English Language!

Angry wife to her husband

An Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone:   
"Where d Hell Are You ...?"

Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewellery Shop Where You Saw The Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn't Have Money That Time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... "O:)

Wife, With A Smile & Blushing: Yeah I Remember That My Love!

Husband: I 'm in the Pub Just Next To That Shop

A Special Package for Business Men.

An Airline Introduced A Special Package For Business Men. Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free. After Great Success, The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives Asking How Was The Trip.
All Of Them Gave A Same Reply..."Which Trip?"

Husband was seriously ill

Husband was seriously ill. Doc to wife: Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant & in gud mood, don't discuss ur problems, no tv serial, don't demand new clothes & gold jewels,
Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.

On the way home.. Husband: what did the doc say ?

Wife:- .No chance for u to survive

An intelligent wife

''An Intelligent Wife Is One Who Makes Sure She Spends So Much
That Her Husband Can't Afford Another Women"

New SIM to surprise her husband

Woman Buys A New Sim Card Puts It In Her Phone And Decides To Surprise Her Husband Who Is Seated On The Couch In The Living Room. She Goes To The Kitchen, Calls Her Husband With The New Number: "Hello Darling"

The Husband Responds In A Low Tone: "Let Me Call U Back Later Honey, The Dumb Lady Is In The Kitchen..

Wife treats husband

A Wife Treats Hubby By Taking Him To A Lap Dance Club For His Birthday ..

At The Club: Doorman Says: Hi Jim How R You?

Wife Asks: How Does He Know You?            
Jim Says: Oh Dear, I Play Football with Him

Inside Barman Says: The Usual Jim ?           
Jim Says To Wife: Before You Say Anything, He's On the Darts Team in My Local

Next A Lap Dancer Says: Hi Jim        
Do You Crave Special Again?

The Wife Storms Out Dragging Jim With Her & Jumps Into A Taxi..

Driver Says "Hey Jimmy Boy, You Picked Up An Ugly One This Time.."

Jim's Funeral Is On Sunday

Cool message by a wife

Cool Msg by a woman: Dear Mother-in-law, "Don't Teach me how 2 handle my children, I'm living with one of yours & he needs a lot of improvement"

Sweet demand by kid

A Sweet demand by a kid. 

A kid was beaten by his mom. Dad came n asked - what happen son?      

Kid said-I can't adjust with your wife anymore, I want my own.

Lion bounced on wife

In an African Safari, A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.       
WIFE: Shoot him! Shoot him!          
SANTA: Yes, Yes. I'm changing d battery of my camera..

Laws of Life !!!

1)Law Of Telephone: When You Dial A Wrong Number, You Never Get A Busy Tone.

2)Law Of Mechanical Repair: After Your Hands Become Coated With Grease Your Nose Will Begin To Itch.

3)Law Of The Workshop: Any Tool, When Dropped, Will Roll To The Least Accessible Corner.

4)Law Of The Alibi: If You Tell The Boss You Were Late For Work Because You Had A Flat Tire, The Next Morning You Will Have A Flat Tire.

5)Bath Theorem: When The Body Is Immersed In Water, The Telephone Rings.

6) Law Of Encounters: The Probability Of Meeting Someone You Know Increases When You Are With Someone You Don't Want To Be Seen With.

7) Law Of The Result: When You Try To Prove To Someone That A Machine Won't Work, It Will.

8) Law Of Biomechanics: The Severity Of The Itch Is Inversely Proportional To The Reach.

9) Theater Rule: People With The Seats At The Furthest From The Aisle Arrive Last.

10) Law Of Coffee: As Soon As You Sit Down For A Cup Of Hot Coffee, Your Boss Will Ask You To Do Something Which Will Last Until The Coffee Is Cold.

11) Law Of Proposal : After U Accept A Proposal You Will Get A Better One

Find two animals in this pic...

Mr. Bean v/s Einstein

Einstein & Mr.Bean sitting next to each other on a long flight..

Einstein says,"Let's play a game.. I will ask you a question,if you don't know the answer,you pay me only $5 and if I don't know the answer,I will pay you $500.."

Einstein asks the first question:
What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon..?

Mr.Bean doesn't say a word,reaches his pocket, pulls out a $5..

Now,it's Mr.Bean's turn.. He asks Einstein:
What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes down on 4 legs..?

Einstein searches the net and asks all his smart friends.. After an hour he gives Mr.Bean $500..

Einstein going nuts and asks:
Well,so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four..?

Mr.Bean reaches his pocket and gives Einstein 5$

Indian Hell

Mindset

Side Effects of working in the IT sector!!!

These are real life anecdotes shared by IT people:

I once left home to go to the market wearing my ID card
and did not realize till my friend asked me why I was wearing it !!!!

_____________________________________________________________

Once I was flashing my ID card instead of unlocking the house door with keys.

__________________________________________________________

Few days back I slept at 12:00 in the night and woke up in the morning
at 7:00 and suddenly thought that I haven’t completed 8 hours and
laughed at myself when I realized that I am at home.

__________________________________________________________

Me and my friends went out for dinner in one of the best restaurants. .
And as I finished.. I started walking towards the wash basin with Plates in my hand..
___________________________________________________________

Once I was on call with my father and mom was not around.
I went on to ask, “Why is she not attending the status call?”
_________________________________________________________

I don’t login to orkut, yahoo, gmail, youtube, etc..
at my personal internet connection at home…
thinking it will be blocked any way.
Till I realize – I am at home.
____________________________________________________________

Yeah sometimes it do happens with me also.
keeping hands in front of tap for waiting
water to drop by itself is very frequent with me.
I just forget that we have to turn on and off the tap….
____________________________________________________________

Once after talking to one of my friends
I ended the conversation saying,
” Ok bye…in case of any issues will call u back”
___________________________________________________________

Sometimes when I mistakenly delete a message
from my mobile, I hope for a second, maybe it’s in the recycle bin

_______________________________________________________________

I gave my office mail id and password to access Gmail and
wondered when they became invalid???

__________________________________________________________

Once I went to a pharmacy n asked for a tab….
pharmacist asked whether I want 250mg or 500mg…..
I replied 256mb ….thank god he didn’t notice.
____________________________________________________________

Me getting a thought of doing an Alt+Tab while switching
from a news channel to the DVD while watching TV.
_____________________________________________________________

And I – after a forty hour marathon in Bhubaneshwar with Powerbuilder,
decided to take a break and went to a movie. In the middle of the movie, when I wanted to check the time,
I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the theatre screen!
_____________________________________________________________

Once I was getting down from an auto giving him Sodexo instead of 10 rupee note...

Our Life

Jokes

Boss: Where were you born?

Vimal: India..

Boss: which part?

Vimal: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India.

2 Boys were fixing a bomb in a car.

Boys 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.

Boys 2: Dont worry, I have one more.

Vimal: What is the name of your car?

Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.

Vimal: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

Vimal joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.

Vimal: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.

Vimal: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!

Vimal: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

Vimal: U cheated me.

Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.

Vimal: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '

NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:

In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?

Vimal: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....

Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.

Vimal: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?

Vimal: An old king's skeleton.

Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?

Vimal: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.

Woodcutter Story

Once upon a time a very strong woodcutter ask for a job in a timber merchant, and he got it. The paid was really good and so were the work conditions. For that reason, the woodcutter was determined to do his best.

His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he was supposed to work.

The first day, the woodcutter brought 18 trees

"Congratulations," the boss said. "Go on that way!"

Very motivated for the boss’ words, the woodcutter try harder the next day, but he only could bring 15 trees. The third day he try even harder, but he only could bring 10 trees.Day after day he was bringing less and less trees.

"I must be losing my strength", the woodcutter thought. He went to the boss and apologized, saying that he could not understand what was going on.

"When was the last time you sharpened your axe?" the boss asked.

"Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe.
I have been very busy trying to cut trees..."

Intelligent Calculation

Update your results in comments.

Complete & Finish

No English dictionary has been able to explain the difference between the two words COMPLETE and FINISHED, in a way that's easy to understand.
Some people say there is no difference between COMPLETE & FINISHED.

I beg to differ because, there is!!!

When you marry the right woman, you are "COMPLETE"..

And when you marry the wrong one, you are "FINISHED"!

And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are ...
"COMPLETELY FINISHED" !!

Jokes For You

Why do we sometimes write 'etc' at the end in the exam?

Bcoz it means....
!
!

!
E-End of
T-thinking
C-capacity.

*************

How to Create d Biggest Doubt in ur Wife's Mind 4 u?
?
?
?

Just Suddenly send her SMS Saying..

"I Luv u too" .

.
GAME OVER.!

*************

When do you knw ur in love?
Ans. When you start searching for the cheapest mobile plan

*************

Wht is the Diff b/wYoung Age & Old Age?

Simple..

In Young Age
Phone Is Full Of Darlings Numbers..

In Old Age
Its Full of Doctors Numbers..!-

*************

"Why is Facebook such a hit?
It works on the principle that-

'People are more interested in others life than their own-!

*************

A Ques Asked In A Talent Test:
If You Are Married To 1 Of The Twin Sisters, How wud You Recognize Your WIFE?

The Best Answer
- Why d Hell Should I recognise?..

Allow The Boss To Speak First

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss
are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.

The ghost says,
"Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three,
I will allow one wish each"

So the eager senior manager shouted,
"I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries."
Pufffff. and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be In Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pufffff. and he was also gone.

The boss calmly said,
"I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm."



MORAL OF THE STORY IS:
"ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSS TO SPEAK FIRST"

Do not judge people..Story

Inspiring share for the day.                                           
                                                                           
    One truck driver was doing his usual load delivery at a mental         
    hospital, by parking his vehicle beside an open drain.                 
                                                                           
    He discovered a flat tyre when he was about to return from the mental 
    hospital. He jacked up the truck and removed the flat tyre to fix the 
    spare tyre.                                                           
                                                                           
    When he was about to fix the spare tyre, he accidentally dropped all   
    the 4 bolts in the open drain.                                         
                                                                           
    Just then, one patient happened to walk past him and asked the driver 
    as to why he was looking troubled.                                     
                                                                           
    The driver thought to himself, since there is nothing much he can do or
    this mental joker can. Just to keep the bugging away, the truck driver 
    informed the whole episode to the mental patient and gave a helpless   
    look.                                                                 
                                                                           
    The patient just laughed at the truck driver and said " you just cannot
    even fix such a simple problem? No wonder you are destined to remain a 
    truck driver for life".                                               
                                                                           
    The truck driver was astonished to hear such a compliment from a mental
    guy." Here is what you can do " said the mental guy                   
                                                                           
    "Take one bolt from each of the remaining 3 tyres/wheels and fix it on 
    to this tyre . Then drive down to the nearest workshop and replace the 
    missing ones. Is'nt it simple my friend ".                             
                                                                           
    The truck driver was so impressed with this quick fix answer and asked 
    the patient "how come you are so smart and intelligent and you are here
    at the mental hospital?"                                               
    The patient replied..." hello friend! I stay here because i am crazy   
    but not stupid".                                                       
                                                                           
    No wonder, there are some people, who behave like the Truck Driver,   
    thinking that others are just stupid. So, guys, though you all are     
    learned and wise, but, just watch out, there could be some CRAZY guys 
    in our professional / personal lives, who could give us lot of quick   
    fixes and brush our wisdom.                                           
                                                                           
    The moral of the story is - just do not conclude that you know         
    everything and do not judge people by mere looks/attire stature or     
    academic background.                                                    
                                      

Sweet Tongue Twisters

1.If you understand, say "understand". If you don't understand, say "don't understand". But if you understand and say "don't understand".How do I understand that you understand? Understand!

2.I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.

3.Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.

4.A sailor went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.

5.Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People

6.If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?

7.I thought a thought.But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought. If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.

8.Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"

9.Mr Inside went over to see Mr Outside. Mr Inside stood outside and called to MrOutside inside. Mr Outside answered Mr Inside from inside and Told Mr Inside to come inside. Mr Inside said "NO", and told Mr Outside to come outside. MrOutside and Mr Inside argued from inside and outside about going outside or coming inside. Finally, 
Mr Outside coaxed Mr Inside to come inside, then both Mr Outside and Mr Inside went outside to the riverside.

10.SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE , BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS, ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES

11.The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.

12.If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors? "When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the 
doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"

13.We surely shall see the sun shine shortly. Whether the weather be fine, Or whether the weather be not, Whether the weather be cold Or whether the weather be hot, We'll weather the weather Whatever the weather, Whether we
like it or not. watch? Whether the weather is hot. Whether the weather is cold. Whether the weather is either or not. It is whether we like it or not.

14.Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely.

15.A flea and a fly in a flue Said the fly "Oh what should we do" Said the flea" Let us fly Said the fly"Let us flee" So they flew through a flaw in the flue

16.If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.

17.Mr. See owned a saw.And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore.Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's
seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.But it was sad to see Soar so sore Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.

PAN Explained

PAN is a 10 digit alpha numeric number, where the first 5 characters are letters, the next 4 numbers and the last one a letter again. These 10 characters can be divided in five parts as can be seen below. The meaning of each number has been explained further.
1. First three characters are alphabetic series running from AAA to ZZZ
2. Fourth character of PAN represents the status of the PAN holder.
• C — Company
• P — Person
• H — HUF(Hindu Undivided Family)
• F — Firm
• A — Association of Persons (AOP)
• T — AOP (Trust)
• B — Body of Individuals (BOI)
• L — Local Authority
• J — Artificial Juridical Person
• G — Government
3. Fifth character represents first character of the PAN holder’s last name/surname.
4. Next four characters are sequential number running from 0001 to 9999.
5. Last character in the PAN is an alphabetic check digit.
Nowadays, the DOI (Date of Issue) of PAN card is mentioned at the right (vertical) hand side of the photo on the PAN card.